Clichés For The Singles
Please excuse me for a moment
While I take a little time
To humor you with some clichés
I hear in this single life of mine
You’ve probably said
Many of these, I’m sure
But don’t be offended
I know your intents are pure
Let’s start with my “favorite”
Which goes a lot like this:
“Maybe you’re not meant in this life
To experience marital bliss”
Gee thanks for your confidence
I’d never thought of that…
I’ve only worried a lot about it
I’m really glad we had this chat
Now onto the next cliché
That I sometimes hear
I’ve been told I’m too picky
But have you seen it here?
It’s a big, fat drought in the land…
Hardly any men in sight
So even if I wanted to be picky
It would be quite the plight
Oh, now here’s a good one
Are you ready for it?
“Just enjoy your life
And don’t worry one bit”
That had never crossed my mind-
To be happy right now
And enjoy my life as it is
Until you said that; Wow!
I guess I’ll go on
Because there’s a few more
You probably didn’t realize
All the clichés I endure
I’ve been told I haven’t met
The right one just yet
But that I’m to be patient
And he’ll find me, no sweat
I’m glad we went over this
I was totally perplexed
I thought I’d found him
And that marriage was next
Because I mean, really
Guys are lined up at my door
I’ve been on so many dates
It’s become a big bore
Of course I am kidding
Remember, it’s a drought
Guys hardly ever talk to me
I forgot what dates are, no doubt
Well, while we’re at it
Let’s go one more round
This is a great one
A real doozy, I’ve found
Many people have said
I intimidate guys
Oh, please…are you sure?
Maybe you should open your eyes
It’s not my “incredible good looks”
Or my “outstanding smarts”
That’s making these guys
Too afraid to share their hearts
There’s nothing about me
That would intimidate men
They just don’t talk to me
And that is the end
So maybe I’ve been
A little sarcastic indeed
But these are clichés
People think I need
I know I’ve made fun
Of all the advice I’ve heard
But it gets old and crusty
And sort of absurd
I know things are said
Because people care for me
But if you heard them many times
Then you’d probably agree
©Alisha Gilbert
April ‘10